I hope you are able to fend off cynicism as long as possible to keep your youthful passion sincere and viable.
Hypocrisy is not the blanket failure it’s made out to be; we all act in ways that conflict with the image we want to reflect or the values we want to embody. Try not to pigeonhole people with expectations; be forgiving of this inconsistency, both in yourself and in others.
It never works anyway.
Friendship, love, and family don’t hinge on any single success or failure; you would do yourself a disservice to administer litmus tests to things as labyrinthine as love and affection.
Don’t try to trade on it; it is something specifically and only yours to explore and enjoy with someone you love. If you treat it as anything more or anything less you’re just gambling away your shot at true intimacy in pursuit of a false sense of self worth.
Just go! Go visit your Peace Corps friend volunteering in Guatemala; go wear a fancy dress to the Daytime Emmys; go chat with the boys at the Ghanaian Soccer Academy benefit. When you get an invitation to do something out of the ordinary see it as a little microcosm of life’s possibilities and say “yes,” even if you’re tired, nervous, or uncertain. At least when you’re older, you’ll be able to reflect on your adventures, instead of regretting shiny bubbles of opportunity that floated away while you were moored to the couch.
You are doubtlessly going to engage in some unhealthy, unwise or otherwise questionable behavior somewhere along the line; this is part of learning your limits and establishing your comfort zone. Please have enough self-awareness to at least make the conscious choice to participate, rather then floating through life getting swept up in whatever trouble comes your way.